Missing Bailey Bug

Today for some reason I am overcome with emotion. Probably because two years ago Monday, Bailey went to be with Jesus. Today I just can't get my mind off her. I do believe that time heals, but I also believe that you can never "fully" get over losing a child. Mr. Walsh, from "America's Most Wanted," was on The Today Show this week. He said it best, "Losing a child is like losing a limb, you don't get over it... you just learn to cope and live without it." I couldn't have said it better myself.

Bailey came home with us at a tiny 2 pounds, 4 ounces. I was scared out of my mind. Yes, we went through the selfish emotions of "why us? and What did we do wrong?" But, those emotions changed to "man, what did we do RIGHT?" We were so BLESSED to be chosen to have her! Bailey had the sweetest spirit. Though she couldn't breathe properly, feed, go to bathroom, walk, talk, hear, or see correctly, she managed to keep a smile on her beautiful face. One of "I'm so lucky to be here!"

She taught us to cherish life... be thankful for every second of every day. She taught us that God does have a purpose for us, we may not know what it is, but there is a reason we are created. We learned the little things that bothered us before, aren't really that important after all. We learned that all the wonderful people in our lives are placed there because we need them. Be thankful.

Today I wish I could hold her one more time. I wish I could feel her hand reach for my face. I wish her crooked little fingers would rap around mine. I wish her beautfil crossed eyes would stare at me again.

Today I feel peace in knowing I will see her again.